Well-Read Life™

How to get kids to get the most from collegePart 2

Guest blog by Keith Ferrazzi

I first met Keith Ferrazzi at a Forbes CEO conference in New York City back in 2004. Keith had been hired to run a corporate speed-dating session among the participants. What a hoot! There I was, spending six minutes exchanging stories with Tony Ruys, the chairman of Heineken. I got to learn about beer while poor Tony had to hear about notebooks. But Keith was a force of energy, talent and enthusiasm that was infectious. I’d happily attend another Ferrazzi event, but fortunately for you and me, Keith also writes books (see below), so we can all easily follow his interesting and empowering advice.

Following up on my previous column on getting the most from college, I asked Keith if he had any thoughts to share on the subject. Turns out he cares deeply about it, as you’ll see by reading his four points below. BTW, Keith is a graduate of Yale University and Harvard Business School.

—Steve

Four Points to Ensure Success Once Students Get Into College

1. Tap into Your Advisor Network

Undergrad is the one time in life in which you will be given advisors—and you don't even have to seek them out! Whether it be your academic advisor, your career advisor, your residential advisor, your peer advisor, your student group advisor, etc., you walk onto campus your first day with a network of trusted advisors, each of whom is individually responsible for an important part of your college experience. Too often you hear of students who met with their academic advisor "a few times" or "only when necessary" during their four years, or who distanced themselves from their rule-enforcing residential advisor as much as possible. More often than not, these students miss out on the invaluable resources handed to them for free.

The real "breakthrough" college students who make the most of their college experience tap into their advisor network and capitalize on the value built into these systems. I often lunched with my academic advisor, became best friends with my peer advisor, and still turn to my residential advisor for career and personal advice!

2. The Secret of Study Groups

One thing I learned very quickly in college was that I tended to perform much better on exams when I studied with a study group prior to the exam. It wasn't just any study group, however. Our group consisted of members who attended class regularly, who knew the material, and who would hold each other accountable for keeping up. Thus, when we all convened before a big exam, we could bounce questions and answers off each other rapidly and really feel confident that we had mastered the information from class.

The students who chose to keep to themselves and who didn't have these makeshift accountability groups never seemed to perform as well or, conversely, had to study that much harder on their own to perform well. I also benefited from leading these study groups because I knew if I could teach the material to others, I must have truly mastered the work.

3. Gatekeepers Are Significant

As mentioned in Never Eat Alone, some of the most important people on a college campus aren't faculty members but the support staff that keep the university running. One of my favorite people from undergrad was the administrative assistant in the Campus Life Office. In addition to knowing everyone on campus, this woman knew every activity, every event, and every opportunity that any student would need to know. She was easily more connected than even the chancellor with the various offices and colleges on campus, not to mention the more important fact that she, herself, was an amazing person with a storied history of her time working on campus, which was longer than most professors!

Too often I saw students limit their contact with her as they brushed by her desk to go down the hallway to the offices of administrators and deans. They will never realize how much they missed out on by forsaking one of the most important relationships one can have in college: the relationships with administrative assistants and other, well-connected gatekeepers.

4. Keep Yourself Together

The three points above all involve your relationships with other important people on campus, but before you are able to relate well with others, you really need to have yourself together. College is the first time so many young people are away from home. You often hear that sentence as a reason why people get out of control with alcohol or have poorer eating habits their freshman year. Well, it's also the same reason that freshmen become disorganized messes! All of a sudden every part of your life—eating, studying, working, etc.—is completely your responsibility. This is overwhelming for so many students who don't see the transition coming.

Before you go tapping into your advisor network, organizing study groups, or befriending the staff around campus, you need to know who you are and get yourself organized! Otherwise, these support systems won't know how to help you. Too often freshmen forget who they are in an attempt to avoid sticking out among their peers. It wasn't until the first few weeks in when I got comfortable just being myself that my social relationships in college really began to flourish. Don't be something that you're not, and be committed and organized about the person you are. That is when others will embrace you and can help you the most.

—Keith

For more of Keith’s advice, check out his new book, Who's Got Your Back. And look for the upcoming college version of his first bestseller Never Eat Alone for Students.

And now to you, dear reader: What’s the best advice you received as you went off to college? And has it translated into your life-after-graduation? I’d love to hear. Just click on the Comments link below. (If you’re reading this as an email, click here and you'll connect to Comments.)

—Steve

College: It’s not where you get in, but how you come out

Across America, graduating high school seniors are gasping to catch their breaths after crossing the college application finish line. They have finally chosen, from the colleges that accepted them, the college they will attend. The tortuously long process of counseling, SAT prep courses, essay writing, campus visits, letters of recommendation, community service, leadership building, and testing, testing and more testing is enough to make a student’s eyes glaze over—if they’re still open after the all-nighters.

(At our house, the marathon ended when our younger son sent his acceptance to Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in Troy, New York. Yes, I’m proud of him.)

But there is something flawed with the whole college application ordeal. Virtually all the emphasis is on where you get into college, and almost none on how to get the most out of college. It’s as if the brand name of the institution, and where it sits on overly simplified rankings, will be the most important factor in the student’s future life.

Rethinking the equation

In fact, what matters far more than the name on the hat is how the mind under the hat engages that college. Yet as a nation, we devote far fewer resources to helping students suck the marrow from colleges than on how to ace the SAT.

I recently spoke with Jeffrey Brenzel, Dean of Undergraduate Admissions at Yale, who says we’ve got it perfectly backwards.

“We’ve reversed the equation—that the college is going to make something out of your life, when actually it’s the student who makes something out of college,” he says. 

Here’s what Dean Brenzel says students and their parents need to know:

“Any strong college contains infinitely more opportunity than any student, no matter how smart and motivated, can extract in four short years. No kid is going to tap out one of these places. If students are prepared to engage, they will find resources in abundance. If they are not, it doesn’t matter if they are hand carried into their dream schools.”

For a fascinating account of the Yale admissions process and the damaging fixation on misleading college ratings, listen to Dean Brenzel’s podcast here.

Not a few pearls but many oysters

The consequences of our upside-down priorities are important, both for hundreds of thousands of individual young students who taste rejection from a tiny ecosystem of top institutions, and also for our nation. This skewed thinking misses the true greatness of education in America: the many hundreds of fine colleges and universities where millions of young people can open the world for their enrichment. In America, there aren’t just a few academic pearls—there is a vast collegiate oyster bed stretching from sea to shining sea.

The statistics bear this out.

Any number of studies of luminaries in various professions demonstrate that far more leaders come from colleges not in the top brand rankings. This is partly a matter of numbers, as the quantity of graduates from Harvard, Yale, Princeton, MIT and Stanford is tiny compared with all the rest. But it’s really more that there are hundreds of colleges and universities more than good enough to provide motivated and skilled students the education they need to succeed at the highest levels.

Malcolm Gladwell explains this overlooked fact in his newest book, Outliers: The Story of Success. If you examine, for example, where Nobel Prize winners in medicine and chemistry went to college, you’ll find no dominance of the elite schools. 

It’s possible that our skewed emphasis on trying to get into a handful of top schools has an unintended benefit of handing millions of kids early rejection, which can sometimes fire more ambition. Whether or not this is the case, we should be paying more attention to helping students gain the most they can from the schools they attend. And just what would be this advice?

I put this question to Yale’s Jeffrey Brenzel, to John Jaquette, the executive director of Cornell’s campus-wide entrepreneurship program, and to Tom Morris, who for a decade was an inspired and inspiring professor of philosophy at Notre Dame. Here are a few of their recommendations:

1. Seek out the top professors no matter what they teach, regardless of whether it’s related to your major, and sit in on one of their lectures. It will be easy to learn who they are from campus buzz.
2. Reach out to your fellow students and expect to learn as much from them as from faculty members. Some will remain friends for life. Others may be future business partners.
3. Make a special effort to connect with students from different backgrounds. You may never have another chance to so easily gain insights into so many other cultures.
4. Get inside places on campus you normally wouldn’t enter. Take a tour of the bell tower, or the backstage of the theater, or the nanotechnology lab or broadcast studios—wherever you’re not likely to be as part of your regular school life.

I know from counseling my own two sons that it’s easier to give this advice than to act on it. College students are usually overloaded with work. In their few spare hours, they naturally seek the comfort of friends and familiar routes—or just a nap. But I remind my boys that their college years will fly by, and they may never again have it so easy to witness unfamiliar scenes and engage in lofty discussions with unusual people. And who knows what those encounters may touch off?

What’s your advice?

What advice do you have to share? What did you find most useful in your college years?

Put another way, if you had college to do over again, what would you do differently? I’d love to hear your stories and share them here. (Then email this to a college-age person close to you; I’d love to hear from them, too.)

Just click on the Comments link below. (If you’re reading this as an email, click here and you'll connect to Comments.)

For my next posting, look for a follow-up column on how to get the most from college from networking guru Keith Ferrazzi, the author of the bestselling Never Eat Alone and Who’s Got Your Back.

The True Gift of Buying Early

A few Decembers past, I was walking slowly beside Stanley Marcus as we toured a shopping mall. Mr. Stanley, as his many fans called him, was already in his 90s and walked with a cane befitting America’s Merchant Prince. I asked if he had finished his Christmas shopping.

“Yes,” he said. “You see, I shop all year round and put the gifts in the closet. Then, before Christmas, I lay the gifts out on my bed and if the person is still alive, I send theirs to them.”

This made me laugh, of course. As I’ve recounted the story to friends over the years, it’s with the perspective that this must be what life gets to if you’re lucky enough to reach your 90s. And also, that it’s admirable someone could plan ahead so thoughtfully.

Now that I’m older, I wonder if there was another lesson I had missed—the lesson of buying gifts early.

My usual pattern, probably like many people, is to procrastinate so that as the event approaches, I’m increasingly annoyed with myself about not having completed my shopping. A dozen times I might feel the prick of my job undone. What should I buy for these special people in my life?

Occasionally, however, I’ve done things right—the Mr. Stanley way—and purchased a gift quite early that I knew the person would love. What a pleasure this is!

Then I can envision, over and over, how my loved one will adore the gift. A dozen times I can play out in my imagination how delighted the recipient will be when the surprise reveals itself beneath the wrapping. Rather than worrying about the deadline, I look forward to the event.

To actually accomplish this early buying, I’ve had to reprogram myself into always being in the gift-buying mindset—to always have my radar on for matching loved ones with gifts. Not that I always accomplish this, but more and more I do.

As an example, over the summer I was having a beer with one of my brothers-in-law when he mentioned his favorite book and that it was long out of print. I asked about his copy and learned it was a worn paperback. The next day I ordered a nice hardcover, which has been waiting for months in my closet to surprise him this Christmas. (Don’t tell.)  I’m smiling now, just thinking about how much he’ll appreciate it.

If it’s better to give than to receive, then buying early prolongs and amplifies the enjoyment. Could this have been the lesson Mr. Stanley had been offering me?

Alas, I can’t ask him, nor send him a Christmas gift. He passed away a few years ago, vigorous to the end. And his many gifts to me and others still are laid out on the beds of our memories.

 How about you—have you discovered the joys of early or year-round gift shopping? I’d love to hear. Just click on the Comments link below. (If you’re reading this as an email, click here and you'll connect to Comments).

Philosopher Tom Morris on Tough Economic Times

His colleagues couldn’t believe what Tom Morris was going to do.

He was an academic superstar. After receiving his Ph.D. from Yale, Tom was now a tenured full professor in the University of Notre Dame’s Philosophy Department. His academic publishing was astounding, including numerous books published by the prestigious Oxford University Press, as well as Cornell University Press and Notre Dame Press, among others.

Moreover, as a teacher, Tom’s classes were among the most popular on campus. With his energetic, funny style, including tossing candy bars into the audience to reward correct answers, Tom was renowned for getting even Notre Dame’s football players charged up about Socrates, Plato and Aristotle.

Yet Tom taught the meaning of life: to discover your talents, develop those talents, and deploy them into the world to help others. And Tom had discovered a new talent of his own: speaking to large, general audiences. He decided to leave his safe and successful professor’s job to launch into the hurly burly life of a national speaker and author for the general public. His first mainstream book, True Success, in which he developed his renowned Seven C’s of Success, was quickly followed by If Aristotle Ran General Motors, Philosophy for Dummies, The Stoic Art of Living and many others.

Tom’s speaking career took off. I first had the thrill of hearing him back in 1994 when he spoke to a business group I belong to, and I became one of his many fans. Tom reciprocated and once spoke at Levenger, when he was in town giving a talk for a big industry conference.

In a sea of self-help gurus, Tom stands out. He has a rare talent for understanding the best thinkers of the past, making it easy for all of us to grasp their most profound messages and apply these perspectives to our own lives.

And so it is understandable that his speaker’s bureau would look to Tom during these tough times to write a message to all their clients. The Washington Speakers Bureau represents such diverse talent as Tony Blair, Colin Powell, Anderson Cooper, Tom Peters and John Cleese. The bureau’s management asked Tom to write something short and powerful that they could send to their clients to be of assistance during these challenging times. Tom did so, and his message went out on May 9th.

I asked Tom if we could send out the same message to the Levenger community, many of whom are also dealing with tough changes in their work and in their lives. Tom said yes, by all means.

He added: “I’m huge fan of Levenger, as well as being a long-time customer. And, over the years, I’ve been very impressed to learn that the Levenger family includes many of the most creative and accomplished people in America. I would love to help bring this group of amazing people some of the most penetrating wisdom we have about powerful adaptation and what it takes to master the art of change. And I’d love to hear from them what they think.”

- Steve

Adaptation
Mastering the Art of Change

by Tom Morris

We’re living now in a period of widespread, unsettling change and growing economic uncertainty. Every day seems to bring with it a new cause for anxiety. It’s easy to worry about the future. But the great philosophers of the past have recommended something very different from that reaction: the positive response of creative adaptation.
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A situation becomes favorable only when we adapt to it.
The I Ching
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One of the primary sources of power in life is the skill of adaptation. It’s also one of the most important contributors to long-term success. As someone who has studied for decades the wisdom of the ages on all aspects of personal achievement, I’ve come to understand something very important. Our ability to flex appropriately with changing circumstances, and our knack for transforming our circumstances in accordance with our own highest aspirations, are two distinct sides of adaptation. And they are both absolutely necessary for attaining business and personal excellence in times of change.

The good news is that there is an art of change that will give us the crucial inner keys for masterful adaptation. A consistent practice of this art can generate amazing results.
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What in the whole universe is more natural than change?
Marcus Aurelius
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The art of change, as understood by its masters, consists of three component arts:

(1)    The art of self-control
(2)    The art of positive action
(3)    The art of achievement

Each of these component arts has a few simple rules that can be derived from the deepest practical wisdom of the great thinkers. Let’s take just a minute to consider them.

The art of self-control has three basic requirements:

1.    Don’t rush to judgment. Many ancient philosophers believed that nothing is as good as it seems or as bad as it seems, so we should all just calm down. Complex situations are hardly ever what they initially appear to be. And in turbulent times, the well-known category, “A Blessing in Disguise” may have a lot of potential applications. When we stop ourselves from rushing to judgment about new developments, we empower ourselves to deal with them as they really are.
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Things often love to conceal their true nature.
Heraclitus
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2.    Value the right things. We tend to value comfort and security a bit too highly in our culture. Growth and learning are also crucial for a good life. If we value the right things to the right degree, we are more open to the positive adventures that even initially difficult change can bring into our lives.
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Only in growth, reform, and change,
paradoxically enough, is true security to be found.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
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3.    Use your imagination well. In economically unpredictable times, our imaginations can easily run wild, projecting worst-case scenarios, and taking our emotions to places we don’t need to go. The only reliable cure for negative imagination is positive imagination. When we use our minds to project desirable scenarios, we actually strengthen our ability to make those things happen.
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You can’t depend on your judgment
when your imagination is out of focus.
Mark Twain
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The art of positive action also has three fundamental requirements:

1.    Govern your attitudes. Negative attitudes can sneak up on us and hold us back. The good news about attitude is that it’s ultimately within our control. We can choose to consider the positive possibilities of a situation, or to forgive a person who may have tripped us up. We can also take measures – such as daily walking, jogging, or meditation – that can indirectly but almost magically transform our attitudes. Good attitudes can lead to great outcomes.
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With our thoughts, we make the world.
The Buddha
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2.    Look for opportunities. The churn of change always creates new opportunities. The most successful people actively look for emerging opportunities in times of change, and so are among the first to take advantage of possibilities that didn’t previously exist. In every challenging era, some people grow and benefit. By always searching for new opportunities, we can be among those people.
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Know your opportunity.
Pittacus
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3.    Take the initiative. In uncertain times, people hunker down, hoping the storms will pass. A common trait of high achievers is a very different tendency to take action. By being action-oriented, we can make the most of new opportunities, which are often fleeting and must be seized quickly. Leaders always show initiative. In situations of rapid change, it’s up to each of us to do so.
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In the arena of human life, the honors and rewards
fall to those who show their good qualities in action.
Aristotle
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Finally, the art of achievement requires that we focus our energies toward favorable outcomes by living in accordance with seven universal conditions for positive achievement. In times of change, we need to use “The 7 Cs of Success” constantly and relentlessly, as individuals and as teams. We need:

C1: A clear CONCEPTION of what we want, a vivid vision, a goal clearly imagined.
Goal setting is often tough in the whirl of rapidly altering events, but it’s always important. A disciplined use of our intellects and imaginations to envision new targets adapted appropriately to the vicissitudes of our day will enable us to move forward productively as great problem solvers and creative examples to others.

C2: A strong CONFIDENCE that we can attain our goal.
In situations of tremendous change, the first thing most people lose is their inner sense of confidence. Confidence is an attitude and, as such, is within our control. We can boost it by how we think, talk, and act. And we owe it to ourselves, as well as to those around us, to do exactly this, since confidence is contagious and can drive success in surprising ways.

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Fortune favors the brave.
Terence
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C3: A focused CONCENTRATION on what it takes to reach the goal.
We need to focus and refocus ourselves in times of upheaval, and concentrate our thought and energy on what’s required each day for the outcomes we seek.

C4: A stubborn CONSISTENCY in pursuing our vision.
Consistency doesn’t mean doing things the way we’ve always done them, but keeping our actions in line with our highest goals and deepest values. The most powerful adaptation requires this kind of consistency as we adjust to new realities.

C5: An emotional COMMITMENT to the importance of what we’re doing.
Passion fuels excellence. Without an emotional commitment to our work, and to the people around us, we can easily find that unexpected change saps our strength. A commitment of the heart energizes us all to do great things in new ways.
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It is always the adventurers who accomplish great things.
Montesquieu
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C6: A good CHARACTER to guide us and keep us on a proper course.
Change often calls for compromise, but never for a compromise of character. The stronger your character is, the better you’ll weather any storm. Integrity matters.

C7: A CAPACITY TO ENJOY the process along the way.
If we can laugh at the absurdities life often throws at us, and find aspects of our work to enjoy during even trying times, we can achieve creative, lasting results.

By practicing the overall art of change each day – following the simple requirements of self-control, positive action, and ongoing achievement – we can position ourselves to make the most of any change that comes our way. We can be masters of adaptation.
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Man has unrivalled powers of self-adaptation.
Charles Kingsley
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The wisdom of the past can guide us reliably into the future. If we use it every day, we can best live the adventures we’re here in this world to have, and we can attain forms of success that will sometimes surprise us even more than it bewilders our neighbors.

As Tom says, he’d love to hear what you think—as would I. Just click on the Comments link below. (If you’re reading this as an email, click here and you'll connect to Comments). And please share Tom’s message with anyone who may benefit from it.

Adaptation: Mastering the Art of Change © 2008 Tom Morris